Victoria bans rooting

Presetned without comment:

David Llewellyn-Smith


  1. Mining BoganMEMBER

    Meh, there’s been plenty of times I would rather have had a cup of tea and a lamington.

    • Know IdeaMEMBER

      While I may lack imagination, the mechanics of using that combination is not clear to me. Urban Dictionary was no great help.

      But my curiosity has now been exhausted.

        • darklydrawlMEMBER

          I thought it might be a code word for “somone with a dandruff issue”. No accounting for taste / takes all types / each to their own / not that there is anything wrong with that / et al…..

  2. If you need to go online to get screwed I’ve got a few suggestions!

  3. ErmingtonPlumbingMEMBER

    I think someone should look in on Reusa and make sure he is OK.

    This could push him over the edge.

  4. Everyone enjoying their 30 day free trial of Communist China: Down Under?

    Fire up those social credit scores!

  5. turncoatMEMBER

    I secretly aspired to a webcam girl but never imagined government would insist we conduct our affairs similarly.

  6. ErmingtonPlumbingMEMBER

    Does the dividing partitions in public toilets allow for the breaking of Social distancing requirements when using Glory Holes?

    Asking for a Friend,…Well actually Im asking for Harry.

    • As a plumber – do you install glory holes? If so, how much? Asking for a flatmate.

      • ErmingtonPlumbingMEMBER

        I have an extensive collection of hole saws.
        67mm is my most commonly used size.

        And @ Drawlie
        Yes,… price will be quoted apon inspection of job to be done.

    • I think Glory holes should be safe, since you avoid contact provided you wear a rubber.

    • glory hole

      I’m not sure which is the more shocking:
      * That such a thing exists.
      * That I had never heard the term until today.
      * That everyone else here seems to be familiar with them.

      From the web
      A glory hole (also spelled gloryhole and glory-hole) is a hole in a wall, or other partition, often between public lavatory cubicles or adult video arcade booths and lounges, for people to engage in sexual activity or observe the person in the next cubicle while one or both parties masturbate.

  7. You can only visit for vigorous nookie as that counts as exercise. No talking allowed, so you may as well bring the gimp mask as long as its n95 rated.

    • DominicMEMBER

      There’ll be some strange scenes unfolding in Victoria as people in Hazmat suits are spotted wrestling.

    • ErmingtonPlumbingMEMBER

      Actually Scott Morrison has just updated these mandatory requirements, after getting of the phone with pastor Houston.
      Only Pro creational intercource is to be allowed, no birth control and definitely no oral allowed.
      Exemptions have been made for under aged boys and religious instructors.

  8. Aside Neville’s woeful handling of this, it’s obvious how you can sidestep it.

    2 residences of ordinary habitation
    Or outright lies to the constabulary, who I am sure will be most delighted to be policing this

    Does ASIS/DSD have the capability that Israel does to turn on tracking en masse?

    Might be time to quickly buy a dumbphone, eh?

  9. Every day, the absurdity of this β€œlockdown” plan to save a handful of elderly becomes more and more starkly apparent. to even the most dull-witted