Melbourne’s lockdown hits peak stupid

I live in the Melbourne suburb of Ashburton near the apex of Glen Iris and East Malvern.

Last week, concrete barriers were erected at the local BMX/skate park in Glen Iris to stop children riding in the name of “public safety”:

Basketball hoops have also been removed from several public parks, also in the name of “public safety”.

The Law of Unintended Consequences quickly swung into effect with children grabbing shovels and creating their own improvised BMX stunt parks along empty land adjoining Gardiners Creek. These improvised BMX tracks have not only turned the land into chewed-up boggy marshes, but have also led to children plunging head first into the rocky Gardiners Creek, risking severe spinal injury or death.

If the Victorian Government wants Melburnians to comply with lockdown rules, it needs community buy-in. Punishing their children with draconian laws created without scientific backing is the entirely wrong approach.

Where is the evidence that exercising in the open air is a public health risk? Why hasn’t the government considered the negative impacts on mental and physical health when devising these rules?

There has to be some carrots and not just sticks. Low risk outdoor activities must be permitted if the Victorian Government wants compliance in the areas that pose the greatest risk to the community.

Unconventional Economist


  1. “Yes Mein Fuhrer , the concrete obstacles have been installed as you do wisely instructed. The rebellious uprising of wayward offspring has been suppressed! “

  2. Or perhaps actually enforce compliance amongst the cohorts where the problem starts and continues to fester? Then the rest of us including kids could get back on with our lives…

  3. It is beautiful watching you squirm that when the government takes away one of the freedoms you hold dear you make all the fuss in the world. When it comes to vaccination you essential tar anyone who is hesitant as a conspiracy theorist. It is partly why I have unsubscribbed and I have been a paying member since 2013 and part of the site at least from 2011.

    • When have I called anybody a “conspiracy theorist”. Please provide specific examples? Yes, I am pro vax and have encouraged people to get the jab because it’s the only way out of lockdowns. If you disagree, that’s fine. You obviously want to be locked down indefinitely.
      I await your response.

          • Alright, i’ll re-subscribe, if you can put together 1 article which explores:

            – If you are in hospital with Covid in Australia what is the treatment being provided. Are there any alternative treatments being used in other countries that Australia isn’t exploring. How did India’s numbers drop?
            – What gurantees/indeminties did any governments give big pharams on the delivery of vaccines. You can use any country as Australia might be too small
            – If every Australian is vaccinated, based on current hospitalisations of vaccinated people how many people will be expected to be in hospital due to Covid.
            – Are there any known or speculative long term effects of the vaccines

            Just a couple of simple questions which I think would be useful to others.

          • You are asking a bit much of me there. First, I don’t believe a lot of that data exists. And if it did, I’m not sure where to find it.

            I’m not a medical expert. But I can tell you that I’ve had the vaccine and had no issues. Everybody that I know who’ve had the vaccine (dozens of people), bar one person, also had no problems (apart from minor symptoms for a day or so).

            The one person that I do know that had problems with vaccination had a bad reaction and went to hospital, but is recovering.

            I also know several people that have had COVID overseas. Two people that were unvaccinated (one in the US, one in the UK) nearly died (both around my age). The ones that were vaccinated felt crappy for a few days (like a bad cold) but recovered quickly.

            The way I see it, the only way out of lockdowns is if enough of the population are vaccinated. I live in Melbourne, and after ~225 days of lockdown am sick of it. I want my freedom back.

            You live in Sydney and are likely feeling the same way.

          • “The way I see it, the only way out of lockdowns is if enough of the population are vaccinated. I live in Melbourne, and after ~225 days of lockdown am sick of it. I want my freedom back.”

            So how exactly is vaccination the “way out of lockdown”. Accepting death and sickness is the way out of lockdown.
            I doubt enough people are actually there though.

          • TheLambKingMEMBER

            So how exactly is vaccination the “way out of lockdown”. Accepting death and sickness is the way out of lockdown.
            I doubt enough people are actually there though.

            With vaccination you accept MUCH LESS death and sickness as a way out of lockdown!

          • With vaccination you accept MUCH LESS death and sickness as a way out of lockdown!

            Not only that, but it’s still going to be mostly the oldies, fatties and sicklies dying – just fewer of them !

      • While I dont necessarily agree with your stance on the lockdowns I agree with you on this and your stance on vaccinations. I think you may have fallen into a logic trap here. By framing the comment the way they did they imply Anti Vax is righteous and Pro Vax is Evil, then implied you need to defend your stance.

        the Correct response to this would have been……

        “So what, getting vaccinated will help and will for the most part replace the need for lockdowns.

        To be anti vax is to be pro lockdown,”

          • Come now, this is the biggest event in our lives. I’ll simplify it, pick one dot point. I can understand you don’t want to get on the bad side of the algorithms or Cancel Culture/MSM next time you want to talk about a topic other than COVID. You can add all the caveats you want, such as, they are questions worth exploring but this is the information I found but won’t draw a conclusion without more data.

            Putting aside lockodwn fatigue could you at least admit they are questions worth exploring?

          • TheLambKingMEMBER

            I’ll have a go 🙂

            – If you are in hospital with Covid in Australia what is the treatment being provided. Are there any alternative treatments being used in other countries that Australia isn’t exploring. How did India’s numbers drop?

            -Australian hospitals only use approved medicines and treatments – ones that have been backed by evidence.
            -Australia will use ‘alternate’ treatments when they have been proven to work (unlike the sheep dip)
            -India number are dropping due to vaccinations, mask wearing & and a sh!te load of people getting infected.
            “There is no evidence that new guidance on the use of ivermectin and hydroxychloroquine led to a reduction in COVID-19 cases in India,” they found. (

            – What gurantees/indeminties did any governments give big pharams on the delivery of vaccines. You can use any country as Australia might be too small

            This sounds very much like a conspiracy theory!

            – If every Australian is vaccinated, based on current hospitalisations of vaccinated people how many people will be expected to be in hospital due to Covid.

            Still a lot – but you are still 30 times more likely to be hospitalized if you are not vaccinated and 5 times more likely to get infected in the first place! But we are talking ~1000s than ~50,000

            – Are there any known or speculative long term effects of the vaccines

            Vaccines, as a class of drug, have almost no long term side effects (plenty of known short term reactions). Almost every human on earth over the last 50 years has had dozens of vaccines. Vaccines leave the body within a week or 2, and the ONLY thing left is the bodies natural immune response to that vaccine.

          • Lest anyone be persuaded by his faux-authoritative tone, LambKing has previously admitted fundamental lack of understanding of how mRNA vaccines work, clearly has no qualification in the area and can be ignored.

      • Great discussion, gets to the heart of problem. The pressure should be put on the government to stop being tyrants, not on the unvaccinated standing in the way of “benefits”. Very disappointed in Australian government so far, bunch of unethical conspiring fear mongers

  4. reusachtigeMEMBER

    Thankfully they never closed down parks and skate parks this time around in NSW. The local skate park is packed every day with kids because they haven’t had to go to school in months! My neighbors 9 and 11 year old have new skateboards and new scooters so that they can fit in with the crowd, literally. Oh to be a kid now and not having to get an education other than hard knocks. I’d just learn property investment later.

    • I was talking to a young fella the other day ( 20ish) who was pretty damn depressed as his whole life has been put on hold. Being stuck in a small coastal town full of retirees is great if you’re an older surfer with a missus and his wild oats sowing days behind him, but not so great for the young buck who only wants to try his darndest to mate with every attractive woman in the known world.

      I certainly felt for the young bloke. I was put to thinking this morning when you made that comment about NSWELSHMAN standing over all the QLD breeders this morning…..reminded me of all the runs chasing cyclone swell and chicklets over the border into the Sundhine state when I was a young fella previous to becoming a born again Sandgroper. Every seed we sowed -and there was plenty – probably improved the average IQ and attractiveness of the QLD population by 1000%.

      Good times!

      How’d the old border raid song go?…..

      “The Queensland boys are here
      The Queensland boys are queer
      They’ll give you their women
      They’ll give you their beer
      The Queensland boys are here”

    • Didn’t notice anything like this driving past the skate park near Merv Hughes oval in Footscray yesterday either.

      • Arthur Schopenhauer

        Yep. You need to move “North of the Yarra” to Banyule. None of that idiocy around here.

        We’ve even got a Green Local Councilor! OMFG! 🤯😉

      • Look at the average age of these idiots.

        Desk jockey, power tripping boomers talking their own book thinking that what is good for them is good for everyone else.

        I would bet a green grocer that the person who had to install those bollards with a forklift or crane would have been saying “this is f&*cked” the whole time they were doing it. What a complete waste of rates.

      • I can’t say too much – but certain family members are involved with ministers in Victorian level – the spread in Victoria is happening through teens who have absolutely zero tolerance left for compliance.

        Really big push to deal with it and this is part of it – you will also notice a big campaign against graffiti.

        Covid Delta strain has been repeatedly shown to spread in outdoor settings – that is absolutely NOT in dispute at all.


        • “Covid Delta strain has been repeatedly shown to spread in outdoor settings – that is absolutely NOT in dispute at all”.

          Yet at the daily media conference, Sutton and Co admitted a few weeks back that they don’t have any evidence that virus has spread at playgrounds, only that it could or might have.

          There are loads of kids that have simply moved to other less safe areas. Kids will be kids.

  5. That’s an injury claim waiting to happen.

    20 kids and one concrete block. One stumble and the council’s screwed for not securing it properly.

  6. In my LGA, all the basketball rings have already been removed for a long, long time already. The problem are not the young, but man going out at midnight playing basketball, simply because they can.

    When the health authorities sees the number of cases increasing in those under 18, they’re not allowed to do anything about it. So the political minders comes up with stupid rules instead to demonstrate they’re “doing something about it”.

    What about the threat to remove state school funding?

    • Great that they removed the hoop making clear space for the young to get steady on their roller skates:)) Tennis & basketball courts make excellent smooth surface now there are no rinks left:((( win win

  7. Meanwhile the bike paths are packed with riders. They not required to wear masks either. Stupid and inconsistent rules

    • Early last year when covid non sense getting in full swing & Sunday morning beach front more riot vehicles & multiple squads of 6 coppers patrolling mask infringements along a single km of beach front. I happily rode my bike mask free the way you’re supposed to:) I asked a few of the squads if they thought their Sunday overtime was overki11 given folk were out walking babies, dogs enjoying the sunshine. After a jealous appraisal of my lovely bike the smartest a$$ amongst them boldly asked “who are you? The Penguin?” Pot kettle black…goons in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle costume making sure folk don’t breathe fresh air:)) Any wonder the dress ups are required:))

  8. Temp fence suppliers in regional Vic made a ki11ing as playgrounds & skate parks went into lockdown and were imprisoned:) Needless to say there were a few breakdowns. A rattle gun or shifter will do the trick. Somehow St Kilda skate park didn’t go into lockdown this time round and there were literally 50-60 children, parents & teenagers enjoying the sunset spectacle last Tuesday. Clearly the author lives in the wrong suburb:)))

  9. lol, the same pack of p***ks that couldn’t build a round-about without incompetence, graft or outright corruption and yet we are constantly ‘shocked’ at covid miss management.

    Who is gold standard this week?

  10. If the kids had learnt how to use simple machines in Physics classes they would’ve easily removed the obstacles. Maybe it’s a good opportunity for some outdoor mechanical engineering experiments 🙂

    • Agree. Ammonium nitrate and diesel stuffed into a football sock remains a great way to remove tree stumps and other such obstacles.

    • A lever and a fulcrum would topple this. Or alternatively a tirfor winch and a snatch block. I can assure you that if I was in my teens I would have had that barrier out of the way in no time. (mad keen bmx’er).

  11. Are you sure Dan is not enhancing the facilities? That last concrete slab could be a fun-box or a spine. Dan Andrews should demonstrate by either jumping over it, or maybe pop a fufanu or a foot-jam-tailwhip, into a re-entry. Maybe chuck in a bar spin as well.

  12. You have yourself to blame. What did you think would happen when you allow politicians too much power to lock down people, businesses and schools. You think they know when to draw the line? You think they know what’s best for you and the community? Time and time again we see what happens when you give politicians and people in power room to take away your freedoms. This is how it starts and slowly escalates till one day you wake up in a world where you have have to show your papers when you want to go to the beach to make sure you took your 3 month injections which is making you feel a bit queasy. The danger is thinking that’s way to far off and someone will hit the stop button before that happens…surely.

    • This as explained 18 months ago, but he didn’t want to listen.
      It’s a bit late to get upset after you have already given away your freedom.

  13. The lock Us down section of society got exactly what they wanted.
    If we let it rip we’d be done and dusted…

  14. Hard lockdowns, mask wearing, social distancing, curfews don’t work. The evidence is in. We went hand fast early so we wouldn’t end up like NSW, yet here we are. Rapidly rising case numbers. How does a virus spread so rapidly with so many rules in place that is supposed to prevent spreading? The biggest killer here is the government lockdowns, it kills people though suicide, it kills businesses, it’s badly effecting children’s health. The jab, well it seems useless to me and the potential side effects outweigh it’s benefits as it doesn’t stop you catching it, spreading it, possibly reduces the effects of cv-19 and those jabbed are still locked down. The perceived benefit is not there.

    So what is the solution? Let th individual make their own personal choice, if you want to jab, wear a mask, socially isolate, don’t exceed 5km, don’t go out after 9pm, then please feel free to do so. Everyone needs to become responsible for their own personal health after taking on board the information provided.

    • Agreed and well put. The government should never say – “we’ll set you free when we get to % of vaccinations.” Just open up and let everyone manage their own risk. The vaccinated bedwetters can stay at home sucking their thumbs while the rest of us get on with it.

      What a shit vaccine – it says it will protect you from the unvaccinated, but all it does is make you more afraid.

    • Yes, it impacts businesses, but so would the widespread death of a large part of the population, even 2% would cause a malaise in the confidence and mindset of people.

      There is No evidence there has been any change in suicide rates, and no one gave a rats a#se before covid.

      Effecting childrens health? How, the majority sat around the TV playing computer games and rarely did anything physical, 1 hr of exercise is probably more than they have ever used.

      As for the rest of your reasoning, thats just paranoia and fear talking. I was sceptical about them ever developing a vaccine as they have never managed to do it for a corona virus before, but they did. The Speed they produced it does make you wonder how they managed it. You seem to err on the side of “its fake or useless and will make me grow extra legs” where I err on the side that there was no money in corona vaccines so there was no real research being done. Give them enough of a financial incentive and suddenly the impossible becomes reality.

      If the Vaccine is only 50% effective in reducing transmission it cuts the R value in half, if that means it drops below 1 then the virus wipes itself out. Sure people still get sick, and a lot will still die but it could reduce that by a factor of 10 or more.

      I got the jab, and I will get the booster when it comes out. Talking with friends in the ACT health system has made me realise that I dont want to get full C-19 sick if the system is over run so if I can reduce the impact I will.

  15. Yes I noticed a huge group of local youth constructing a new mountain bike track on the creek 2 weeks ago. Fortunately a not very well known tennis wall has only got a sign on it, so all good.

  16. The Traveling Wilbur

    I refute completely that we’ve seen peak stupid. There’s plenty more to come.

    Like this ↑ comment from BtoB above for example from someone who doesn’t know WA or Qld exist.

      • The Traveling Wilbur

        Where’d you rather be right now? WA or Newcastle? What about 6-months from now?

        And who is accountable for that.

        • In 6m time, when WA-ans and qld bogans are not jabbed at desired rate, you’ll have an outbreak too.

          Lock downs work if their purpose is to make a safety island which is guarded zealously. This made sense in early days but not any more as our quarantine is leaky as a sieve and the primary objective is to springboard immigration to compensate for 2020/2021.
          What you seem cannot fathom is that when nsw and vic are done with jabbing and there is a stockpile of jabs for covud treatment, virus will miraculously go wild in other states, wa and qld inclusive

  17. Lord DudleyMEMBER

    If you place any impositions on the anti vaxxers, they’ll screech like banshees. And your governments are too weak to override them, because you’ve been giving in to the noisiest idiots for decades now.

    The result is that you get more impositions elsewhere. Including crazy overreach stopping your kids going outside.

    Antivaxxers are scum. Welcome to hell.

    • What if one is vaccinated and one’s young children are all up to date on the immunisation schedule but would also love “pro-vax” zealots to show a little humility and restraint and appreciate it was a very quickly produced vaccine for which we lack any long term safety data? That the vaccine does protect well against serious COVID-related illness and death but that some people may have reservations about aspects of the process?
      It may prove to be a breakthrough for the ages but only time will tell.
      Does lacking religious certainty and its associated angry fervour make one an “embicile”?

      • c’mon Olaf, you know that the vast majority of pro-vax are sensible and don’t have, or need, religious certainty. That dialogue want – you’re right, that information is there and the open-minded, sensible folk have or will be vaccinated. Many of the target unvaxed aren’t going to shift and will probably perform Triple Trump Twists to turn that dialogue into evidence. Imagine, acknowledging the lack of evidence in long-term effects and then trying to shift that group to vax.

    • Right here is someone who advocates for apartheid, medical apartheid. The discrimination and segregation of people in the same society. Welcome to the club if bigotry, you are an honorary member.

        • Who would have thought after 20 years of teaching inclusion, diversity and acceptance that it really means nothing

          • +1

            In other news, there is apparently no difference between excluding someone from society because they’re over 6’5″, and excluding someone from society because they’re a thief.

    • Antivaxxers are scum. Welcome to hell.
      Lord Dudley

      I’ve just made a vaccine for you Lord Dudley. I won’t tell you what is in it. I am not sure exactly what it will do to you. I will not be held responsible for any harm.

      But if you do not allow me to inject this vaccine into your body YOU ARE SCUM.

      I am pro-vax. I simply believe the current definition of vaccine is too loose. The current AstraZeneca and Pfizer products have not yet met my definition of a vax that I can be pro about.

  18. Those measures are insane (and I would not have believed them unless photos supplied) and have nothing to do with health – predilections of control freak…

    At some point, the cost will far far exceed the benefit.

    • It smells too much of a couple of councillors who hate the idea of kids being provided a place to play and are using Covid as an excuse to kill it…

      Parents of the kids who use it should take this as an opportunity to bond with their spawn , Go out there and remove the barriers. a good chance to show kids some engineering principals like levers etc.

  19. Leith, you are beating your head against a brick wall trying to get honest and sensible answers out of Dan & Co. People have been asking these questions for 18 months.

  20. I don’t see the point here LVO.
    Lockdown in Perth meant lockdown. No playground areas, only going to the shop when necessary, wearing gloves and masks and undertaking all other hygiene measures. We killed that virus and there is NONE in the community now, except for what Penny Wong has rightly described as the virus distribution centres AKA places of hotel quarantine.
    Perth is enjoying plays in several venues, the ballet, music in pubs outdoor sports and the upcoming grand final in front of 61,000 cheering fans.
    If only people would stay in one place for a couple of weeks, the virus would work its way through the infected and everyone else would be safe thereafter.

    • Perth is one of the most remote cities on earth.
      Its also sparsely populated.
      I think that has more to do with it

      • 2.2 m people in Perth. There were outbreaks of earlier variants from cruise ships and others, but they were locked down swiftly and absolutely. Yes, the only way a virus can arrive is across a border, so effective quarantine is essential. If the delta strain arrives, that might be a different outcome, but people here were very compliant during lockdowns.
        Seychelles is also isolated but it has gotten whacked.


    Everything old is new again!

    Seriously though.. Playground and skate park closures suxx a$$ but we are in a raging pandemic and the kids are getting it this time. Getting kids to school should be priority. Not getting on the nangs and vapes down back. Also scooters should be fcken banned also. They are lame ass.

    In fact I reckon the younguns are the crucial factor at the minute:

  22. Not in dispute that risk is miniscule. First thing that will be permitted post-lockdowns will be outdoor socializing