I do like Christmas. Maybe the memories of childhood have engrained a sense of wonderment. Maybe it’s the way I see people’s behaviour change in the weeks around the Christmas break – the extra friendly waves, smiles, and ease of starting conversations with strangers, really gives credit to the power such celebrations to the national psyche.
Of course, I don’t spend much time in shopping malls, and I’ve heard that this is the epicenter of the opposite type of behavior change – one necessary to maintain a standing in the Christmas Gift Arms Race.
The arms race begins when a friend or family member takes it upon themselves to outdo everyone else to give the most thoughtful, and often extravagant, gifts. Since the receiver of such gifts has taken the easy path of giving a token gift, such a chocolates or other tasty Christmas treats, they feel guilty about appearing at next year’s Christmas get-together with such a lousy attempt at gift giving. The bar has been set, and you spend a little more time and money on gifts the following year.
But by meeting the raised bar, you yourself are making others feel the same. This self-reinforcing arms race can lead to Christmas chaos, and the kind of emotional pressure most people can surely do without at this time of year.
The economic burden of Christmas is not usually expressed in this way. Economists have, however, given some attention to the fact that the gift giver is unlikely to know the preferences of the gift recipient as perfectly as they themselves know, and as such, the perfect gift is close to impossible. A ‘deadweight loss’ occurs because of Christmas because gift givers cannot know as much as receivers their tastes, and studies have shown that gift recipients value gifts at only 80-90% of their costs to givers.
So how do we maintain Christmas cheer and eliminate the arms race. Here are my tips for giving gifts that allow you to escape the arms race, but maintain the pleasure of giving.
- Delay buying some non-urgent things for yourself, and drop them into conversation with you family in early December. “Those whatchyamacallits look fantastic, I’ve always wanted one but still can’t bring myself to try them.”
- Find a gift that is a consumable that the person uses in their hobby. Not only will it get used, but it also shows that you know the persons personality well. For nerds a new fangled gadget is good, or for coffee snobs, a bag of exotic coffee beans might give them something else to fuss over.
- For any male over 5 years old, one of these is a great idea (I’ve never known anyone to not like them)
- Try something practical that the recipient is unlikely to be aware exists. Maybe something you spotted on your travels that doesn’t seem to be available in Australia. Expect a response such as “Wow, that’s such an amazing idea. Why haven’t I seen this before”
- Don’t fret about recycling gifts. Apparently many people are quite happy to do this, while others hate it. Convince your friends and family to embrace re-gifting to take the pressure off you gift choices. This is especially good for kids who grow out of toys and clothes very quickly.
Any other tips would by greatly appreciated? Are there any gifts that always impress?
Merry Christmas dear readers
Tips, suggestions, comments and requests to rumplestatskin@gmail.com + follow me on Twitter @rumplestatskin